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Title: Probatur Aliter
Author: Jonathan Swift [
More Titles by Swift]
A long-ear'd beast, and a field-house for cattle,
Among the coals doth often rattle.[1]
A long-ear'd beast, a bird that prates,
The bridegrooms' first gift to their mates,
Is by all pious Christians thought,
In clergymen the greatest fault.[2]
A long-ear'd beast, and woman of Endor,
If your wife be a scold, that will mend her.[3]
With a long-ear'd beast, and medicine's use,
Cooks make their fowl look tight and spruce.[4]
A long-ear'd beast, and holy fable,
Strengthens the shoes of half the rabble.[5]
A long-ear'd beast, and Rhenish wine,
Lies in the lap of ladies fine.[6]
A long-ear'd beast, and Flanders College,
Is Dr. T----l, to my knowledge.[7]
A long-ear'd beast, and building knight,
Censorious people do in spite.[8]
A long-ear'd beast, and bird of night,
We sinners art too apt to slight.[9]
A long-ear'd beast, and shameful vermin,
A judge will eat, though clad in ermine.[10]
A long-ear'd beast, and Irish cart,
Can leave a mark, and give a smart.[11]
A long-ear'd beast, in mud to lie,
No bird in air so swift can fly.[12]
A long-ear'd beast, and a sputt'ring old Whig,
I wish he were in it, and dancing a jig.[13]
A long-ear'd beast, and liquor to write,
Is a damnable smell both morning and night.[14]
A long-ear'd beast, and the child of a sheep,
At Whist they will make a desperate sweep.[15]
A beast long-ear'd, and till midnight you stay,
Will cover a house much better than clay.[16]
A long-ear'd beast, and the drink you love best,
You call him a sloven in earnest for jest.[17]
A long-ear'd beast, and the sixteenth letter,
I'd not look at all unless I look'd better.[18]
A long-ear'd beast give me, and eggs unsound,
Or else I will not ride one inch of ground.[19]
A long-ear'd beast, another name for jeer,
To ladies' skins there nothing comes so near.[20]
A long-ear'd beast, and kind noise of a cat,
Is useful in journeys, take notice of that.[21]
A long-ear'd beast, and what seasons your beef,
On such an occasion the law gives relief.[22]
A long-ear'd beast, a thing that force must drive in,
Bears up his house, that's of his own contriving.[23]
[Footnote 1: A shovel.]
[Footnote 2: Aspiring.]
[Footnote 3: A switch.]
[Footnote 4: A skewer.]
[Footnote 5: A sparable; a small nail in a shoe.]
[Footnote 6: A shock.]
[Footnote 7: A sloven.]
[Footnote 8: Asperse. (Pearce was an architect, who built the
Parliament-House, Dublin.)]
[Footnote 9: A soul.]
[Footnote 10: A slice.]
[Footnote 11: A scar.]
[Footnote 12: A swallow.]
[Footnote 13: A sty.]
[Footnote 14: A sink.]
[Footnote 15: A slam.]
[Footnote 16: A slate.]
[Footnote 17: A swine.]
[Footnote 18: Askew.]
[Footnote 19: A saddle.]
[Footnote 20: A smock.]
[Footnote 21: A spur.]
[Footnote 22: Assault.]
[Footnote 23: A snail.]
[The end]
Jonathan Swift's poem: Probatur Aliter
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