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The Unspeakable Perk, a novel by Samuel Hopkins Adams |
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CHAPTER IV - TWO ON A MOUNTAIN-SIDE |
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_ ORCHIDS do not, by preference, grow upon a cactus plant. Little though she recked of botany, Miss Brewster was aware of this fundamental truth. Neither do they, without extraneous impulsion, go hurtling through the air along deserted mountain-sides, to find a resting-place far below; another natural-history fact which the young lady appreciated without being obliged to consult the literature of the subject. Therefore, when, from the top of the appointed rock, she observed a carefully composed bunch of mauve Cattleyas describe a parabola and finally join two previous clusters upon the spines of a prickly-pear patch, she divined some energizing force back of the phenomenon. That energizing force she surmised was temper. "Fie!" said she severely. "Beetle gentlemen should control their From below rose a fervid and startled exclamation. "Naughtier, naughtier!" deprecated the visitor. "Are these the "You haven't lived up to your bet," complained the censured one. "Indeed I have! I always play fair, and pay fair. Here I am, as "Nearly half an hour late." "Not at all. Four-thirty was the time." "And now it is three minutes to five." "Making twenty-seven minutes that I've been sitting here waiting "Waiting? Oh, Miss Brewster--" "I'm not Miss Brewster. I'm a voice in the wilderness." "Then, Voice, you haven't been there more than one minute. A voice "There is something in that argument," she admitted. "But why "Does one look for a sound?" "Please don't be so logical. It tires my poor little brain. You "That would have been like holding you up for payment of the bet, "Not good form in Caracuna. The senor should always speak first." "You began the other time," he pointed out. "So I did, but that was under a misapprehension. I hadn't learned "Is that what you are?" he queried in a slightly depressed tone. "What on earth else could I be?" she returned, amused. "Of course. But we all like to pretend that our fairy tales are "I can readily picture you chasing beetles, but I can't see you "Nor can I. If you chase them, they vanish. Every one knows that." "Anyway, your orchids were fit for a fairy queen. I haven't "Indeed you have. Much more than they deserve. By coming here to- "Oh, that was a point of honor. Are you going to let those lovely If this were a hint, it failed of its aim, for, as the hermit "'Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair.'" "So you do know something of fairies and fairy lore!" she cried. "Oh, it wasn't much more than a hundred years ago that I read my "Well, I can't spare any more of my silken tresses. I brought a "I've used it to tether a fairy thought so that it can't fly away "Thank you so much, and I'm so glad that you are feeling better." "Better?" "Yes. Better than the day before yesterday." "Day before yesterday?" "Bless the poor man! Much anxious waiting hath bemused his wits. "But I was all right the day before yesterday." "You weren't. You were a prey to the most thrilling terrors. You "I'm not going to," he assured her, stepping forth obediently. "Basilisk that I am!" she laughed. "How brown you are! How long "Fourteen weary Voiceless months. Not on this island, you know, "Yet you look vigorous and alert; not like the men I've seen come "Why shouldn't I be clean?" "Of course you should. But people get slack, don't they, when they "Nothing of the sort," he denied, with heat. "No? Oh, my poor little vanity! He wouldn't dress up for us, "I own a razor, if that's what you mean. You're making fun of me. "Although beyond the pale of law, "Oh, lovely! What a noble finish. What is it?" "Extract from 'Biographical Blurbings.'" "Autobiographical?" "Yes. By Me." "And are you beyond the pale of law?" "Poetical license," he explained airily. "Hold on, though." He Later she was to recall that confession with sore misgivings. Now "Is that why you ran away from the tram car yesterday?" "Ran away? "The matter in hand being me." "Why, yes; and the acquaintance being Mr. Cluff. I saw him throw "Nothing extraordinary about it." His voice came up out of the "To leave a woman who has been insulted--" "In more competent hands than one's own." "Oh, I give it up!" she cried. "I don't understand you at all. "Tradition," he repeated thoughtfully. "Why, I don't know. They're "Is that your philosophy? Suppose a man struck you. Wouldn't you "Perhaps. It would depend." "Or insulted your country? Don't you believe that men should be "Some men. Soldiers, for instance. They're paid to." "Good Heavens! Is it all a question of pay in your mind? Wouldn't "How can I tell until the occasion arises?" "Are you afraid?" "I suppose I might be." "Hasn't the man any blood in his veins?" cried his inquisitor, "Oh, of course; and sorry for it afterward. One is likely to lose "Like Fitzhugh Carroll. Why not say it? Well, I much prefer him "Of course," he acquiesced patiently. "Any girl would. It's the "And yours is the scientific, I suppose. That doesn't take into "Oh, yes," he replied tranquilly. "I've done my bit of hero "No! Really? Do go on. You're growing more human every minute." "Do you happen to know anything about the Havana campaign?" "Not much. It never seemed to me anything to brag of. Dad says the "Spanish-American War? That isn't what I'm talking about. I'm The girl's lip curled. "So that's your idea of heroism! Scrubby peckers into the lives of "Have you the faintest idea what you are talking about?" His voice had abruptly hardened. There was an edge to it; such an "Perhaps I haven't," she admitted. "Then it's time you learned. Three American doctors went down into "Don't!" cried the girl. "I--I'm ashamed. I didn't know." "How should you?" he said, in a changed tone. "We Americans set up There was a long pause, which she broke with an effort. "Mr. Beetle Man?" "Yes, Voice?" "I--I'm beginning to think you rather more man than beetle at "Well, you see, you touched me on a point of fanaticism," he "Do you mind standing up again for examination? No," she decided, "To keep the sun out of my eyes." "And the moon at night, I suppose. They're not for purposes of "Disguise! What makes you say that?" he asked quickly. "Don't bark. They'd be most effective. And they certainly give "If you don't like my face, consider my figure," he suggested "Stumpy," she pronounced. "You're all in a chunk. It does look "Don't you like it?" he asked anxiously. "Oh, well enough of its kind." She lifted her voice and chanted:-- "He was stubby and square, "There's a verse in return for yours. Mine's adapted, though. "Very musical." "I'm not musical at all." "Oh, I'm considering you as a VOICE." "I'm tired of being just a voice. Look up here. Do," she pleaded. When orbs like thine the soul disclose, Don't be afraid. One brief fleeting glance ere we part." "No," he returned positively. "Once is enough." "On behalf of my poor traduced features, I thank you humbly. Did "Worse. I've hardly forgotten yet what you look like. Your kind of "What is business?" "Haven't I told you? I'm a scientist." "Well, I'm a specimen. No beetle that crawls or creeps or hobbles, "Woman. Yes, I know all about that. But I'm a groundling." "Mr. Beetle Man," she said, in a tremulous voice, "the rock is "I don't feel it. Though it might be a touch of earthquake. We "Not your rock. The tarantula rock, I mean." "Nonsense! A hundred tarantulas couldn't stir it." "Well, it seems to be moving, and that's just as bad. I'm tired "Caesar! No! My shoulder's still lame. What do you want, anyway?" "I want to know about you and your work. ALL about you." "Humph! Well, at present I'm making some microscopical studies of "Does the microscope add charm to the beetle?" "Some day I'll show you, if you like. Just now it's the flea, the "The wicked flea?" "Nobody knows how wicked until he has studied him on his native "Doesn't the flea have something to do with plague? They say "You've been listening to bolas." "What's a bola?" "A bola is information that somebody who is totally ignorant of "Then there isn't any plague down under those quaint, old, red- "Who ever knows what's going on under those quaint, old, red-tiled "Even I can feel the mystery, little as I've seen of the place," "Oh, that's the Indian of it. The tiled roofs are Spanish; the "Not with all the Caracunans, surely. Take Mr. Raimonda, for "Ah, that's different. Twenty families of the city, perhaps, are "For a hermit of science, you seem to know a good deal of what "So he mentioned. Rather serious, that, you know." "Far from it. He was very amusing." "Doubtless," commented the other dryly. "But it isn't fair to play "For a professedly shy person, you certainly take a rather "Oh, I'm shy only under the baleful influence of the feminine eye. "So have I," she returned maliciously. "Aren't you jealous?" He laughed. "Please be a little bit jealous. It would be so flattering." "Jealousy is another tradition in which I don't believe." "Then I can't flirt with you at all?" she sighed. "After taking PLOP! The sound punctured the silence sharply, though not loudly. "What was that?" asked the girl curiously. "That? Oh, that was a revolver shot," he remarked. "Aren't you casual! Do revolver shots mean nothing to you?" "That one shakes my soul's foundations." His tone by no means Passing across the line of her vision, he disappeared to the left. "No," it said. "There's no hurry. The flag's not up." "What flag?" "The flag in my compound." "Can you see your home from here?" "Yes; there's a ledge on the cliff that gives a direct view." "I want to come up and see it." "You can't. It's much too hard a climb. Besides, there are rock "And when you hear a shot, you go up there for messages?" "Yes; it's my telephone system." "Who's at the other end?" "The peon who pretends to look after the quinta for me." "A man! No man can keep a house fit to live in," she said "I know it; but he's all I've got in the servant line." "How far is the house from here?" "A mile, by air. Seven by trail from town." "Isn't it lonely?" "Yes." Suddenly she felt very sorry for him. There was such a quiet, "How soon must you go back?" "Oh, not for an hour, at least." "If it's a call, it must be an important one, so far from "Not necessarily. Don't you ever have calls that are not No answer came. "Miss Brewster!" he called. "Oh, Voice! You haven't gone?" Still no response. "That isn't fair," he complained, making his way swiftly down, and "You needn't jump out of your skin on my account," said Miss Polly "You are! That is--I mean--I--I--beg your pardon. I--I--" "The poor man's having another bashful fit," she observed, with "You--you startled me." "No!" she exclaimed, in wide-eyed mock surprise. "Who would have Thereupon she got a return shock. "Yes, I did," he said; "sooner or later." "Don't fib. Don't pretend that you knew I was here." "W-w-well, no. Not just now. B-b-but I knew you'd come if--if--if "Young and budding scientist," said she severely, "you're a gay "Well, I knew you wouldn't stay up there much longer." "I'm angry at you; very angry at you. That is, I would be if it "Did any one ever see your face once without wanting to see it "Ah, bravo!" She clapped her hands gayly. "Marvelous improvement "I--I--I forgot," he stammered, "As long as I don't think, I'm all "Oh, the pity of it! Let's find some mild, impersonal topic, then, "Work. Besides, it isn't a parched land. Look on this side." Half a dozen steps brought her around the farther angle, where, "That's my outdoor laboratory." "A dreamery, I'd call it. May I sit down? Are there devilkins "One of my friends and specimens. I'm studying his methods of "Really? Are you an inventor, too? I'm crazy about aviation." "Ah, then you'll be interested in this," he said, now quite at his "Of other places, as well." "But in the tropics it means yellow fever, Chagres fever, and "A monoplane?" repeated the girl, in some puzzlement. "How a "I thought you claimed some knowledge of aviation. Its wings are "Y-y-yes," said the girl doubtfully. "Therefore, if we can breed a biplane dragonfly in sufficient "I don't know much about science," she began, "but I should hardly "It's curious how nature varies the type of aviation," he "You're making fun of me!" she accused, with sharp enlightenment. "What else have you done to me ever since we met?" he inquired "Now I AM angry! I shall go home at once." A second far-away PLOP! set a period to her decision. "So shall I," said he briskly. "Does that signal mean hurry up?" she asked curiously. "Well, it means that I'm wanted. You go first. When will you come "Not at all." "Do you mean that?" "Of course. I'm angry. Didn't I tell you that? I don't permit "I--I--don't know." "Afraid?" "Rather." "Then you must surely come and conquer this cowardice. Will you "No; I don't think so." Miss Brewster opened wide her eyes upon him. She was little "Why?" she said. "I've got something more important to do." "You're reverting to type sadly. What is it that's so important?" "Work." "You can work any time." "No. Unfortunately I have to eat and sleep sometimes." The implication she accepted quite seriously. "Are you really as busy as all that? I'm quite conscience-stricken "Not wasted at all. You've cheered me up." "That's something. But you won't come to the city to be cheered "Yes, I will. When I get time." "Perhaps you won't find me at home." "Then I'll wait." "Good-bye, then," she laughed, "until your leisure day arrives." She climbed the rock, stepping as strongly and surely as a lithe "O disciple of science!" she called. "Well?" "Can you see me?" "Not from here." "Good! I'm a Voice again. So don't be timid. Will you answer a "I've answered a hundred already. One more won't hurt." "Have you ever been in love?" "What?" "Don't I speak plainly enough? Have--you--ever--been--in--love?" "With a woman?" "Why, yes," she railed. "With a woman, of course. I don't mean "No." "Well, you needn't be violent. Have you ever been in love with "Perhaps." "Oh, perhaps!" she taunted. "There are no perhapses in that. With "With what every man in the world is in love with once in his She made a little still step forward and peeped down at him. He "Riddle me your riddle," she commanded. "What is every man in love "An ideal." "Ah! And your ideal--where do you keep it safe from the common "I tether it to my heart--with a single hair," said the man below. "Oh," commented Miss Brewster, in a changed tone. And, again, Still, the spirit of reckless experimentalism pressed her onward. "That's a peril to the scientific mind, you know," she warned. "It won't," said he comfortably. Miss Brewster's regrets sensibly mitigated. "In that case, of course, your career is safe from accident," she He moved out into the open. "Mr. Beetle Man," she called, He looked up and saw her with her chin cupped in her hand, "I'm NOT just a casual acquaintance," she said suddenly. "That is, "That's good," was his hearty comment. "I'm glad you like me "Oh, I'm not so sure that I like you, exactly. But I'm coming to Whether or not he heard the final question she could not tell. He |