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The Foolish Dictionary, a non-fiction book by Gideon Wurdz |
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_ Money makes the mayor go.--Proverbs of Politics. =GALLON= From the Fr. galonner, to make tight. Note, one is sufficient. * * * * * =GALLANTRY= This word is now almost obsolete. It was formerly employed to express a deferential attention on the part of the man who in a crowded car gave up his seat to the ladies. * * * * * =GAMBLER= From the Grk. gumnos, stripped to the skin. And the gambler's the one that does it. * * * * * =GARDEN= From the Fr. garantir, to make good. Hence, a place where lovers make good. * * * * * =GARLIC= From Grk. gar, for, and Lat. liceor, to bid. Good for the biddies. * * * * * =GEM= A breakfast muffin. With the newly married, syn. for "a precious stone." * * * * * =GERM= A bit of animal life living in water. =GERMAN= More animal life, living on beer. * * * * * =GIRAFFE= The champion rubber-neck of the world, and the longest thirst on record. * * * * * =GLOBE= An all-round proposition which has furnished its shareholders a living for several thousand years, though its stock is two-thirds water. * * * * * =GOAT= The honored founder and oldest inhabitant of Harlem, N.Y. Elsewhere, not in good odor. * * * * * =GOLF= An excuse for carrying unconcealed weapons and a Scotch breath. * * * * * =GONDOLA= A pleasure craft which plies in Venice, at World's Fairs and other popular watering places. From Eng. gone, and Lat. dolor, sadness, or Eng. dollar. Sadness gone; also, a gone dollar. * * * * * =GORE= Blood. Shed daily in Chicago abattoirs but never spilled in French duels. * * * * * =GOSSIP= Derived either from the Grk. gups, vulture, or Fr. gosier, wind-pipe. Hence, a vulture that tears its prey to bits, or an exercise of the wind-pipe from which every victim gets a blow. * * * * * =GOUT= The undesirable scion of High Living, which frequent the lowest joints and is mentioned only in the Invalid's Foot-Notes. * * * * * =GOWN= From Lat. gaudium, joy. A thing of beauty and a joy forever; if from Paris, generally an article of some Worth. * * * * * =GUNPOWDER= A black substance much employed in marking the boundary lines of nations. * * * * * =GUM= A substance for sticking. =GUM-GAME= A game in which some one is stuck. * * * * * =GUTTER= A school in which we may study the dregs of humanity or read the reflection of the stars. There's many a slip twixt the toe and the heel. _ |
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