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_ ACT V - SCENE II
[CHARLOTTE'S Apartment.]
[Enter MANLY.]
MANLY.
WHAT, no one at home? How unfortunate to meet the only lady my heart
was ever moved by, to find her engaged to another, and confessing her
partiality for me! Yet engaged to a man who, by her intimation, and
his libertine conversation with me, I fear, does not merit her. Aye!
there's the sting; for, were I assured that Maria was happy, my heart
is not so selfish but that it would dilate in knowing it, even though
it were with another. But to know she is unhappy!--I must drive these
thoughts from me. Charlotte has some books; and this is what I believe
she calls her little library. [Enters a closet.
[Enter DIMPLE leading LETITIA.]
LETITIA.
And will you pretend to say now, Mr. Dimple, that you propose to break
with Maria? Are not the banns published? Are not the clothes
purchased? Are not the friends invited? In short, is it not a done
affair?
DIMPLE.
Believe me, my dear Letitia, I would not marry her.
LETITIA.
Why have you not broke with her before this, as you all along deluded
me by saying you would?
DIMPLE.
Because I was in hopes she would, ere this, have broke with me.
LETITIA.
You could not expect it.
DIMPLE.
Nay, but be calm a moment; 'twas from my regard to you that I did not
discard her.
LETITIA.
Regard to me!
DIMPLE.
Yes; I have done everything in my power to break with her, but the
foolish girl is so fond of me that nothing can accomplish it. Besides,
how can I offer her my hand when my heart is indissolubly engaged to
you?
LETITIA.
There may be reason in this; but why so attentive to Miss Manly?
DIMPLE.
Attentive to Miss Manly! For heaven's sake, if you have no better
opinion of my constancy, pay not so ill a compliment to my taste.
LETITIA.
Did I not see you whisper her to-day?
DIMPLE.
Possibly I might--but something of so very trifling a nature that I
have already forgot what it was.
LETITIA.
I believe she has not forgot it.
DIMPLE.
My dear creature, how can you for a moment suppose I should have any
serious thoughts of that trifling, gay, flighty coquette, that
disagreeable--
[Enter CHARLOTTE.]
DIMPLE.
My dear Miss Manly, I rejoice to see you; there is a charm in your
conversation that always marks your entrance into company as fortunate.
LETITIA.
Where have you been, my dear?
CHARLOTTE.
Why, I have been about to twenty shops, turning over pretty things, and
so have left twenty visits unpaid. I wish you would step into the
carriage and whisk round, make my apology, and leave my cards where our
friends are not at home; that, you know, will serve as a visit. Come,
do go.
LETITIA.
So anxious to get me out! but I'll watch you. [Aside.] Oh! yes, I'll
go; I want a little exercise. Positively [Dimple offering to accompany
her], Mr. Dimple, you shall not go; why, half my visits are cake and
caudle visits; it won't do, you know, for you to go. [Exit, but
returns to the door in the back scene and listens.]
DIMPLE.
This attachment of your brother to Maria is fortunate.
CHARLOTTE.
How did you come to the knowledge of it?
DIMPLE.
I read it in their eyes.
CHARLOTTE.
And I had it from her mouth. It would have amused you to have seen
her! She, that thought it so great an impropriety to praise a
gentleman that she could not bring out one word in your favour, found a
redundancy to praise him.
DIMPLE.
I have done everything in my power to assist his passion there: your
delicacy, my dearest girl, would be shocked at half the instances of
neglect and misbehaviour.
CHARLOTTE.
I don't know how I should bear neglect; but Mr. Dimple must misbehave
himself indeed, to forfeit my good opinion.
DIMPLE.
Your good opinion, my angel, is the pride and pleasure of my heart; and
if the most respectful tenderness for you, and an utter indifference
for all your sex besides, can make me worthy of your esteem, I shall
richly merit it.
CHARLOTTE.
All my sex besides, Mr. Dimple!--you forgot your tete-a-tete with
Letitia.
DIMPLE.
How can you, my lovely angel, cast a thought on that insipid,
wry-mouthed, ugly creature!
CHARLOTTE.
But her fortune may have charms?
DIMPLE.
Not to a heart like mine. The man, who has been blessed with the good
opinion of my Charlotte, must despise the allurements of fortune.
CHARLOTTE.
I am satisfied.
DIMPLE.
Let us think no more on the odious subject, but devote the present hour
to happiness.
CHARLOTTE.
Can I be happy when I see the man I prefer going to be married to
another?
DIMPLE.
Have I not already satisfied my charming angel, that I can never think
of marrying the puling Maria? But, even if it were so, could that be
any bar to our happiness? for, as the poet sings,
"Love, free as air, at sight of human ties,
Spreads his light wings, and in a moment flies."
Come, then, my charming angel! why delay our bliss? The present moment
is ours; the next is in the hand of fate.
[Kissing her.]
CHARLOTTE.
Begone, Sir! By your delusions you had almost lulled my honour asleep.
DIMPLE.
Let me lull the demon to sleep again with kisses. [He struggles with
her; she screams.]
[Enter MANLY.]
MANLY.
Turn, villain! and defend yourself.--[Draws.]
[VAN ROUGH enters and beats down their swords.]
VAN ROUGH.
Is the devil in you? are you going to murder one another?
[Holding Dimple.]
DIMPLE.
Hold him, hold him,--I can command my passion.
[Enter JONATHAN.]
JONATHAN.
What the rattle ails you? Is the old one in you? Let the colonel
alone, can't you? I feel chock-full of fight,--do you want to kill the
colonel?--
MANLY.
Be still, Jonathan; the gentleman does not want to hurt me.
JONATHAN.
Gor! I--I wish he did; I'd shew him Yankee boys play, pretty
quick.--Don't you see you have frightened the young woman into the
hystrikes?
VAN ROUGH.
Pray, some of you explain this; what has been the occasion of all this
racket?
MANLY.
That gentleman can explain it to you; it will be a very diverting story
for an intended father-in-law to hear.
VAN ROUGH.
How was this matter, Mr. Van Dumpling?
DIMPLE.
Sir,--upon my honour,--all I know is, that I was talking to this young
lady, and this gentleman broke in on us in a very extraordinary manner.
VAN ROUGH.
Why, all this is nothing to the purpose; can you explain it, Miss?
[To Charlotte.]
[Enter LETITIA through the back scene.]
LETITIA.
I can explain it to that gentleman's confusion. Though long betrothed
to your daughter [to Van Rough], yet, allured by my fortune, it seems
(with shame do I speak it) he has privately paid his addresses to me.
I was drawn in to listen to him by his assuring me that the match was
made by his father without his consent, and that he proposed to break
with Maria, whether he married me or not. But, whatever were his
intentions respecting your daughter, Sir, even to me he was false; for
he has repeated the same story, with some cruel reflections upon my
person, to Miss Manly.
JONATHAN.
What a tarnal curse!
LETITIA.
Nor is this all, Miss Manly. When he was with me this very morning, he
made the same ungenerous reflections upon the weakness of your mind as
he has so recently done upon the defects of my person.
JONATHAN.
What a tarnal curse and damn, too!
DIMPLE.
Ha! since I have lost Letitia, I believe I had as good make it up with
Maria. Mr. Van Rough, at present I cannot enter into particulars; but,
I believe, I can explain everything to your satisfaction in private.
VAN ROUGH.
There is another matter, Mr. Van Dumpling, which I would have you
explain. Pray, Sir, have Messrs. Van Cash & Co. presented you those
bills for acceptance?
DIMPLE.
The deuce! Has he heard of those bills! Nay, then, all's up with
Maria, too; but an affair of this sort can never prejudice me among the
ladies; they will rather long to know what the dear creature possesses
to make him so agreeable.
[Aside.]
Sir, you'll hear from me.
[To Manly.]
MANLY.
And you from me, Sir--
DIMPLE.
Sir, you wear a sword--
MANLY.
Yes, Sir. This sword was presented to me by that brave Gallic hero,
the Marquis De la Fayette. I have drawn it in the service of my
country, and in private life, on the only occasion where a man is
justified in drawing his sword, in defence of a lady's honour. I have
fought too many battles in the service of my country to dread the
imputation of cowardice. Death from a man of honour would be a glory
you do not merit; you shall live to bear the insult of man and the
contempt of that sex whose general smiles afforded you all your
happiness.
DIMPLE.
You won't meet me, Sir? Then I'll post you for a coward.
MANLY.
I'll venture that, Sir. The reputation of my life does not
depend upon the breath of a Mr. Dimple. I would have you to know,
however, Sir, that I have a cane to chastise the insolence of a
scoundrel, and a sword and the good laws of my country to protect me
from the attempts of an assassin--
DIMPLE.
Mighty well! Very fine, indeed! Ladies and gentlemen, I take my
leave; and you will please to observe in the case of my deportment the
contrast between a gentleman who has read Chesterfield and received the
polish of Europe and an unpolished, untravelled American.
[Exit.
[Enter MARIA.]
MARIA.
Is he indeed gone?--
LETITIA.
I hope, never to return.
VAN ROUGH.
I am glad I heard of those bills; though it's plaguy unlucky; I hoped
to see Mary married before I died.
MANLY.
Will you permit a gentleman, Sir, to offer himself as a suitor to your
daughter? Though a stranger to you, he is not altogether so to her, or
unknown in this city. You may find a son-in-law of more fortune, but
you can never meet with one who is richer in love for her, or respect
for you.
VAN ROUGH.
Why, Mary, you have not let this gentleman make love to you without my
leave?
MANLY.
I did not say, Sir--
MARIA.
Say, Sir!--I--the gentleman, to be sure, met me accidentally.
VAN ROUGH.
Ha, ha, ha! Mark me, Mary; young folks think old folks to be fools;
but old folks know young folks to be fools. Why, I knew all about this
affair. This was only a cunning way I had to bring it about. Hark ye!
I was in the closet when you and he were at our hours.
[Turns to the company.]
I heard that little baggage say she loved her old father,
and would die to make him happy! Oh! how I loved the little baggage!
And you talked very prudently, young man. I have inquired into your
character, and find you to be a man of punctuality and mind the main
chance. And so, as you love Mary and Mary loves you, you shall have my
consent immediately to be married. I'll settle my fortune on you, and
go and live with you the remainder of my life.
MANLY.
Sir, I hope--
VAN ROUGH.
Come, come, no fine speeches; mind the main chance, young man, and you
and I shall always agree.
LETITIA.
I sincerely wish you joy [advancing to Maria]; and hope your
pardon for my conduct.
MARIA.
I thank you for your congratulations, and hope we shall at once forget
the wretch who has given us so much disquiet, and the trouble that he
has occasioned.
CHARLOTTE.
And I, my dear Maria,--how shall I look up to you for forgiveness? I,
who, in the practice of the meanest arts, have violated the most sacred
rights of friendship? I can never forgive myself, or hope charity from
the world; but, I confess, I have much to hope from such a brother; and
I am happy that I may soon say, such a sister.
MARIA.
My dear, you distress me; you have all my love.
MANLY.
And mine.
CHARLOTTE.
If repentance can entitle me to forgiveness, I have already much merit;
for I despise the littleness of my past conduct. I now find that the
heart of any worthy man cannot be gained by invidious attacks upon the
rights and characters of others;--by countenancing the addresses of a
thousand;--or that the finest assemblage of features, the greatest
taste in dress, the genteelest address, or the most brilliant wit,
cannot eventually secure a coquette from contempt and ridicule.
MANLY.
And I have learned that probity, virtue, honour, though they should not
have received the polish of Europe, will secure to an honest American
the good graces of his fair countrywomen, and, I hope, the applause of
THE PUBLIC.
[THE END]
Royall Tyler's play: Contrast
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