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Shavings, a novel by Joseph Crosby Lincoln |
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Chapter 2 |
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_ CHAPTER II But the person who had entered the outer shop saved Mr. Bearse the trouble. He, too, disregarded the "Private" sign on the door of the inner room. Before Gabriel could reach it that door was thrown open and the newcomer entered. He was a big man, gray-mustached, with hair a grizzled red, and with blue eyes set in a florid face. The hand which had opened the door looked big and powerful enough to have knocked a hole in it, if such a procedure had been necessary. And its owner looked quite capable of doing it, if he deemed it necessary, in fact he looked as if he would rather have enjoyed it. He swept into the room like a northwest breeze, and two bundles of wooden strips, cut to the size of mill arms, clattered to the floor as he did so. "Hello, Jed!" he hailed, in a voice which measured up to the rest of him. Then, noticing Mr. Bearse for the first time, he added: "Hello, Gabe, what are you doin' here?" Gabriel hastened to explain. His habitual desire to please and humor each person he met--each person of consequence, that is; very poor people or village eccentrics like Jed Winslow did not much matter, of course--was in this case augmented by a particular desire to please Captain Sam Hunniwell. Captain Sam, being one of Orham's most influential men, was not, in Mr. Bearse's estimation, at all the sort of person whom it was advisable to displease. He might--and did--talk disparagingly of him behind his back, as he did behind the back of every one else, but he smiled humbly and spoke softly in his presence. The consciousness of having just been talking of him, however, of having visited that shop for the express purpose of talking about him, made the explaining process a trifle embarrassing. "Oh, howd'ye do, howd'ye do, Cap'n Hunniwell?" stammered Gabriel. "Nice day, ain't it, sir? Yes, sir, 'tis a nice day. I was just-- er--that is, I just run in to see Shavin's here; to make a little call, you know. We was just settin' here talkin', wan't we, Shavin's--Jed, I mean?" Mr. Winslow stood his completed sailor man in a rack to dry. "Ya-as," he drawled, solemnly, "that was about it, I guess. Have a chair, Sam, won't you? . . . That was about it, we was sittin' and talkin' . . . I was sittin' and Gab--Gabe, I mean--was talkin'." Captain Sam chuckled. As Winslow and Mr. Bearse were occupying the only two chairs in the room he accepted the invitation in its broad sense and, turning an empty box upon end, sat down on that. "So Gabe was talkin', eh?" he repeated. "Well, that's singular. How'd that happen, Gabe?" Mr. Bearse looked rather foolish. "Oh, we was just--just talkin' about--er--this and that," he said, hastily. "Just this and that, nothin' partic'lar. Cal'late I'll have to be runnin' along now, Jed." Jed Winslow selected a new and unpainted sailor from the pile near him. He eyed it dreamily. "Well, Gabe," he observed, "if you must, you must, I suppose. Seems to me you're leavin' at the most interestin' time. We've been talkin' about this and that, same as you say, and now you're leavin' just as 'this' has got here. Maybe if you wait--wait--a--" The sentence died away into nothingness. He had taken up the brush which he used for the blue paint. There was a loose bristle in it. He pulled this out and one or two more came with it. "Hu-um!" he mused, absently. Captain Sam was tired of waiting. "Come, finish her out, Jed--finish her out," he urged. "What's the rest of it?" "I cal'late I'll run along now," said Mr. Bearse, nervously moving toward the door. "Hold on a minute," commanded the captain. "Jed hadn't finished what he was sayin' to you. He generally talks like one of those continued-in-our-next yarns in the magazines. Give us the September installment, Jed--come." Mr. Winslow smiled, a slow, whimsical smile that lit up his lean, brown face and then passed away as slowly as it had come, lingering for an instant at one corner of his mouth. "Oh, I was just tellin' Gabe that the 'this' he was talkin' about was here now," he said, "and that maybe if he waited a space the 'that' would come, too. Seems to me if I was you, Gabe, I'd--" But Mr. Bearse had gone. Captain Hunniwell snorted. "Humph!" he said; "I judge likely I'm the 'this' you and that gas bag have been talkin' about. Who's the 'that'?" His companion was gazing absently at the door through which Gabriel had made his hurried departure. After gazing at it in silence for a moment, he rose from the chair, unfolding section by section like a pocket rule, and, crossing the room, opened the door and took from its other side the lettered sign "Private" which had hung there. Then, with tacks and a hammer, he proceeded to affix the placard to the inner side of the door, that facing the room where he and Captain Sam were. The captain regarded this operation with huge astonishment. "Gracious king!" he exclaimed. "What in thunder are you doin' that for? This is the private room in here, ain't it?" Mr. Winslow, returning to his chair, nodded. "Ya-as," he admitted, "that's why I'm puttin' the 'Private' sign on this side of the door." "Yes, but-- Why, confound it, anybody who sees it there will think it is the other room that's private, won't they?" Jed nodded. "I'm in hopes they will," he said. "You're in hopes they will! Why?" "'Cause if Gabe Bearse thinks that room's private and that he don't belong there he'll be sartin sure to go there; then maybe he'll give me a rest." He selected a new brush and went on with his painting. Captain Hunniwell laughed heartily. Then, all at once, his laughter ceased and his face assumed a troubled expression. "Jed," he ordered, "leave off daubin' at that wooden doll baby for a minute, will you? I want to talk to you. I want to ask you what you think I'd better do. I know what Gab Bearse-- Much obliged for that name, Jed; 'Gab's' the best name on earth for that critter--I know what Gab came in here to talk about. 'Twas about me and my bein' put on the Exemption Board, of course. That was it, wan't it? Um-hm, I knew 'twas. I was the 'this' in his 'this and that.' And Phin Babbitt was the 'that'; I'll bet on it. Am I right?" Winslow nodded. "Sure thing!" continued the captain. "Well, there 'tis. What am I goin' to do? When they wanted me to take the job in the first place I kind of hesitated. You know I did. 'Twas bound to be one of those thankless sort of jobs that get a feller into trouble, bound to be. And yet--and yet--well, SOMEBODY has to take those kind of jobs. And a man hadn't ought to talk all the time about how he wishes he could do somethin' to help his country, and then lay down and quit on the first chance that comes his way, just 'cause that chance ain't--ain't eatin' up all the pie in the state so the Germans can't get it, or somethin' like that. Ain't that so?" "Seems so to me, Sam." "Yes. Well, so I said I'd take my Exemption Board job. But when I said I'd accept it, it didn't run across my mind that Leander Babbitt was liable to be drafted, first crack out of the box. Now he IS drafted, and, if I know Phin Babbitt, the old man will be down on us Board fellers the first thing to get the boy exempted. AND, I bein' on the Board and hailin' from his own town, Orham here, it would naturally be to me that he'd come first. Eh? That's what he'd naturally do, ain't it?" His friend nodded once more. Captain Sam lost patience. "Gracious king!" he exclaimed. "Jed Winslow, for thunder sakes say somethin'! Don't set there bobbin' your head up and down like one of those wound-up images in a Christmas-time store window. I ask you if that ain't what Phin Babbitt would do? What would you do if you was in his shoes?" Jed rubbed his chin. "Step out of 'em, I guess likely," he drawled. "Humph! Yes--well, any self-respectin' person would do that, even if he had to go barefooted the rest of his life. But, what I'm gettin' at is this: Babbitt'll come to me orderin' me to get Leander exempted. And what'll I say?" Winslow turned and looked at him. "Seems to me, Sam," he answered, "that if that thing happened there'd be only one thing to say. You'd just have to tell him that you'd listen to his reasons and if they seemed good enough to let the boy off, for your part you'd vote to let him off. If they didn't seem good enough--why--" "Well--what?" "Why, then Leander'd have to go to war and his dad could go to--" "Eh? Go on. I want to hear you say it. Where could he go?" Jed wiped the surplus paint from his brush on the edge of the can. "To sellin' hardware," he concluded, gravely, but with a twinkle in his eye. Captain Sam sniffed, perhaps in disappointment. "His hardware'd melt where I'D tell him to go," he declared. "What you say is all right, Ed. It's an easy doctrine to preach, but, like lots of other preacher's doctrines, it's hard to live up to. Phin loves me like a step-brother and I love him the same way. Well, now here he comes to ask me to do a favor for him. If I don't do it, he'll say, and the whole town'll say, that I'm ventin' my spite on him, keepin' on with my grudge, bein' nasty, cussed, everything that's mean. If I do do it, if I let Leander off, all hands'll say that I did it because I was afraid of Phineas and the rest would say the other thing. It puts me in a devil of a position. It's all right to say, 'Do your duty,' 'Stand up in your shoes,' 'Do what you think's right, never mind whose boy 'tis,' and all that, but I wouldn't have that old skunk goin' around sayin' I took advantage of my position to rob him of his son for anything on earth. I despise him too much to give him that much satisfaction. And yet there I am, and the case'll come up afore me. What'll I do, Jed? Shall I resign? Help me out. I'm about crazy. Shall I heave up the job? Shall I quit?" Jed put down the brush and the sailor man. He rubbed his chin. "No-o," he drawled, after a moment. "Oh, I shan't, eh? Why not?" "'Cause you don't know how, Sam. It always seemed to me that it took a lot of practice to be a quitter. You never practiced." "Thanks. All right, then, I'm to hang on, I suppose, and take my medicine. If that's all the advice you've got to give me, I might as well have stayed at home. But I tell you this, Jed Winslow: If I'd realized--if I'd thought about the Leander Babbitt case comin' up afore me on that Board I never would have accepted the appointment. When you and I were talkin' here the other night it's queer that neither of us thought of it. . . . Eh? What are you lookin at me like that for? You don't mean to tell me that YOU DID think of it? Did you?" Winslow nodded. "Yes," he said. "I thought of it." "You DID! Well, I swear! Then why in thunder didn't you--" He was interrupted. The bell attached to the door of the outer shop rang. The maker of windmills rose jerkily to his feet. Captain Sam made a gesture of impatience. "Get rid of your customer and come back here soon as you can," he ordered. Having commanded a steamer before he left the sea and become a banker, the captain usually ordered rather than requested. "Hurry all you can. I ain't half through talkin' with you. For the land sakes, MOVE! Of all the deliberate, slow travelin'--" He did not finish his sentence, nor did Winslow, who had started toward the door, have time to reach it. The door was opened and a short, thickset man, with a leathery face and a bristling yellow- white chin beard, burst into the room. At the sight of its occupants he uttered a grunt of satisfaction and his bushy brows were drawn together above his little eyes, the latter a washed-out gray and set very close together. "Humph!" he snarled, vindictively. "So you BE here. Gabe Bearse said you was, but I thought probably he was lyin', as usual. Did he lie about the other thing, that's what I've come here to find out? Sam Hunniwell, have you been put on that Draft Exemption Board?" "Yes," he said, curtly, "I have." The man trembled all over. "You have?" he cried, raising his voice almost to a scream. "Yes, I have. What's it matter to you, Phin Babbitt? Seems to have het you up some, that or somethin' else." "Het me up! By--" Mr. Phineas Babbitt swore steadily for a full minute. When he stopped for breath Jed Winslow, who had stepped over and was looking out of the window, uttered an observation. "I'm afraid I made a mistake, changin' that sign," he said, musingly. "I cal'late I'll make another: 'Prayer meetin's must be held outside.'" "By--," began Mr. Babbitt again, but this time it was Captain Sam who interrupted. The captain occasionally swore at other people, but he was not accustomed to be sworn at. He, too, began to "heat up." He rose to his feet. "That'll do, Babbitt," he commanded. "What's the matter with you? Is it me you're cussin'? Because if it is--" The little Babbitt eyes snapped defiance. "If it is, what?" he demanded. But before the captain could reply Winslow, turning away from the window, did so for him. "If it is, I should say 'twas a pretty complete job," he drawled. "I don't know when I've heard fewer things left out. You have reason to be proud, both of you. And now, Phineas," he went on, "what's it all about? What's the matter?" Mr. Babbitt waved his fists again, preparatory to another outburst. Jed laid a big hand on his shoulder. "Don't seem to me time for the benediction yet, Phineas," he said. "Ought to preach your sermon or sing a hymn first, seems so. What did you come here for?" Phineas Babbitt's hard gray eyes looked up into the big brown ones gazing mildly down upon him. His gaze shifted and his tone when he next spoke was a trifle less savage. "He knows well enough what I came here for," he growled, indicating Hunniwell with a jerk of his thumb. "He knows that just as well as he knows why he had himself put on that Exemption Board." "I didn't have myself put there," declared the captain. "The job was wished on me. Lord knows I didn't want it. I was just tellin' Jed here that very thing." "Wished on you nothin'! You planned to get it and you worked to get it and I know why you did it, too. 'Twas to get another crack at me. 'Twas to play another dirty trick on me like the one you played that cheated me out of the post office. You knew they'd drafted my boy and you wanted to make sure he didn't get clear. You--" "That'll do!" Captain Hunniwell seized him by the shoulder. "That's enough," cried the captain. "Your boy had nothin' to do with it. I never thought of his name bein' drawn when I said I'd accept the job." "You lie!" "WHAT? Why, you little sawed-off, dried-up, sassy son of a sea cook! I'll--" Winslow's lanky form was interposed between the pair; and his slow, gentle drawl made itself heard. "I'm sorry to interrupt the experience meetin'," he said, "but I'VE got a call to testify and I feel the spirit aworkin'. Set down again, Sam, will you please. Phineas, you set down over there. Please set down, both of you. Sam, as a favor to me--" But the captain was not in a favor-extending mood. He glowered at his adversary and remained standing. "Phin--" begged Winslow. But Mr. Babbitt, although a trifle paler than when he entered the shop, was not more yielding. "I'm particular who I set down along of," he declared. "I'd as soon set down with a--a rattlesnake as I would with some humans." Captain Sam was not pale, far from it. "Skunks are always afraid of snakes, they tell me," he observed, tartly. "A rattlesnake's honest, anyhow, and he ain't afraid to bite. He ain't all bad smell and nothin' else." Babbitt's bristling chin beard quivered with inarticulate hatred. Winslow sighed resignedly. "Well," he asked, "you don't mind the other--er--critter in the menagerie sittin', do you? Now--now--now, just a minute," he pleaded, as his two companions showed symptoms of speaking simultaneously. "Just a minute; let me say a word. Phineas, I judge the only reason you have for objectin' to the captain's bein' on the Exemption Board is on account of your son, ain't it? It's just on Leander's account?" But before the furious Mr. Babbitt could answer there came another interruption. The bell attached to the door of the outer shop rang once more. Jed, who had accepted his own invitation to sit, rose again with a groan. "Now I wonder who THAT is?" he drawled, in mild surprise. Captain Hunniwell's frayed patience, never noted for long endurance, snapped again. "Gracious king! go and find out," he roared. "Whoever 'tis 'll die of old age before you get there." The slow smile drifted over Mr. Winslow's face. "Probably if I wait and give 'em a chance they'll come in here and have apoplexy instead," he said. "That seems to be the fashionable disease this afternoon. They won't stay out there and be lonesome; they'll come in here where it's private and there's a crowd. Eh? Yes, here they come." But the newest visitor did not come, like the others, uninvited into the "private" room. Instead he knocked on its door. When Winslow opened it he saw a small boy with a yellow envelope in his hand. "Hello, Josiah," hailed Jed, genially. "How's the president of the Western Union these days?" The boy grinned bashfully and opined the magnate just mentioned was "all right." Then he added: "Is Mr. Babbitt here? Mr. Bearse--Mr. Gabe Bearse--is over at the office and he said he saw Mr. Babbitt come in here." "Yes, he's here. Want to see him, do you?" "I've got a telegram for him." Mr. Babbitt himself came forward and took the yellow envelope. After absently turning it over several times, as so many people do when they receive an unexpected letter or message, he tore it open. Winslow and Captain Sam, watching him, saw his face, to which the color had returned in the last few minutes, grow white again. He staggered a little. Jed stepped toward him. "What is it, Phin?" he asked. "Somebody dead or--" Babbitt waved him away. "No," he gasped, chokingly. "No, let me be. I'm--I'm all right." Captain Sam, a little conscience-stricken, came forward. "Are you sick, Phin?" he asked. "Is there anything I can do?" Phineas glowered at him. "Yes," he snarled between his clenched teeth, "you can mind your own darned business." Then, turning to the boy who had brought the message, he ordered: "You get out of here." The frightened youngster scuttled away and Babbitt, the telegram rattling in his shaking hand, followed him. The captain, hurrying to the window, saw him go down the walk and along the road in the direction of his store. He walked like a man stricken. Captain Sam turned back again. "Now what in time was in that telegram?" he demanded. Jed, standing with his back toward him and looking out of the window on the side of the shop toward the sea, did not answer. "Do you hear me?" asked the captain. "That telegram struck him like a shock of paralysis. He went all to pieces. What on earth do you suppose was in it? Eh? Why don't you say somethin'? YOU don't know what was in it, do you?" Winslow shook his head. "No," he answered. "I don't know's I do." "You don't know as you do? Well, do you GUESS you do? Jed Winslow, what have you got up your sleeve?" The proprietor of the windmill shop slowly turned and faced him. "I don't know's there's anything there, Sam," he answered, "but-- but I shouldn't be much surprised if that telegram was from Leander." "Leander? Leander Babbitt? What . . . Eh? What in thunder do YOU want?" The last question was directed toward the window on the street side of the shop. Mr. Gabriel Bearse was standing on the outside of that window, energetically thumping on the glass. "Open her up! Open her up!" commanded Gabe. "I've got somethin' to tell you." Captain Sam opened the window. Gabriel's face was aglow with excitement. "Say! Say!" he cried. "Did he tell you? Did he tell you?" "Did who tell what?" demanded the captain. "Did Phin Babbitt tell you what was in that telegram he just got? What did he say when he read it? Did he swear? I bet he did! If that telegram wan't some surprise to old Babbitt, then--" "Do you know what 'twas--what the telegram was?" "Do I? You bet you I do! And I'm the only one in this town except Phin and Jim Bailey that does know. I was in the telegraph office when Jim took it over the wire. I see Jim was pretty excited. 'Well,' says he, 'if this won't be some jolt to old Phin!' he says. 'What will?' says I. 'Why,' says he--" "What was it?" demanded Captain Sam. "You're dyin' to tell us, a blind man could see that. Get it off your chest and save your life. What was it?" Mr. Bearse leaned forward and whispered. There was no real reason why he should whisper, but doing so added a mysterious, confidential tang, so to speak, to the value of his news. "'Twas from Leander--from Phin's own boy, Leander Babbitt, 'twas. 'Twas from him, up in Boston and it went somethin' like this: 'Have enlisted in the infantry. Made up my mind best thing to do. Will not be back. Have written particulars.' That was it, or pretty nigh it. Leander's enlisted. Never waited for no Exemption Board nor nothin', but went up and enlisted on his own hook without tellin' a soul he was goin' to. That's the way Bailey and me figger it up. Say, ain't that some news? Godfreys, I must hustle back to the post office and tell the gang afore anybody else gets ahead of me. So long!" He hurried away on his joyful errand. Captain Hunniwell closed the window and turned to face his friend. "Do you suppose that's true, Jed?" he asked. "Do you suppose it CAN be true?" Jed nodded. "Shouldn't be surprised," he said. "Good gracious king! Do you mean the boy went off up to Boston on his own hook, as that what's-his-name--Gab--says, and volunteered and got himself enlisted into the army?" "Shouldn't wonder, Sam." "Well, my gracious king! Why--why--no wonder old Babbitt looked as if the main topsail yard had fell on him. Tut, tut, tut! Well, I declare! Now what do you suppose put him up to doin' that?" Winslow sat down in his low chair again and picked up the wooden sailor and the paint brush. "Well, Sam," he said, slowly, "Leander's a pretty good boy." "Yes, I suppose he is, but he's Phin Babbitt's son." "I know, but don't it seem to you as if some sorts of fathers was like birthmarks and bow legs; they come early in life and a feller ain't to blame for havin' 'em? Sam, you ain't sorry the boy's volunteered, are you?" "Sorry! I should say not! For one thing his doin' it makes my job on the Exemption Board a mighty sight easier. There won't be any row there with Phineas now." "No-o, I thought 'twould help that. But that wan't the whole reason, Sam." "Reason for what? What do you mean?" "I mean that wan't my whole reason for tellin' Leander he'd better volunteer, better go up to Boston and enlist, same as he did. That was part, but 'twan't all." Captain Sam's eyes and mouth opened. He stared at the speaker in amazement. "You told him to volunteer?" he repeated. "You told him to go to Boston and-- YOU did? What on earth?" Jed's brush moved slowly down the wooden legs of his sailor man. "Leander and I are pretty good friends," he explained. "I like him and he--er--hum--I'm afraid that paint's kind of thick. Cal'late I'll have to thin it a little." Captain Sam condemned the paint to an eternal blister. "Go on! go on!" he commanded. "What about you and Leander? Finish her out. Can't you see you've got my head whirlin' like one of those windmills of yours? Finish her OUT!" Jed looked over his spectacles. "Oh!" he said. "Well, Leander's been comin' in here pretty frequent and we've talked about his affairs a good deal. He's always wanted to enlist ever since the war broke out." "He HAS?" "Why, sartin. Just the same as you would, or--or I hope I would, if I was young and--and," with a wistful smile, "different, and likely to be any good to Uncle Sam. Yes, Leander's been anxious to go to war, but his dad was so set against it all and kept hollerin' so about the boy's bein' needed in the store, that Leander didn't hardly know what to do. But then when he was drawn on the draft list he came in here and he and I had a long talk. 'Twas yesterday, after you'd told me about bein' put on the Board, you know. I could see the trouble there'd be between you and Phineas and--and--well, you see, Sam, I just kind of wanted that boy to volunteer. I--I don't know why, but--" He looked up from his work and stared dreamily out of the window. "I guess maybe 'twas because I've been wishin' so that I could go myself--or--do SOMETHIN' that was some good. So Leander and I talked and finally he said, 'Well, by George, I WILL go.' And--and--well, I guess that's all; he went, you see." The captain drew a long breath. "He went," he repeated. "And you knew he'd gone?" "No, I didn't know, but I kind of guessed." "You guessed, and yet all the time I've been here you haven't said a word about it till this minute." "Well, I didn't think 'twas much use sayin' until I knew." "Well, my gracious king, Jed Winslow, you beat all my goin' to sea! But you've helped Uncle Sam to a good soldier and you've helped me out of a nasty row. For my part I'm everlastin' obliged to you, I am so." Jed looked pleased but very much embarrassed. "Sho, sho," he exclaimed, hastily, "'twan't anything. Oh, say," hastily changing the subject, "I've got some money 'round here somewheres I thought maybe you'd take to the bank and deposit for me next time you went, if 'twan't too much trouble." "Trouble? Course 'tain't any trouble. Where is it?" Winslow put down his work and began to hunt. From one drawer of his work bench, amid nails, tools and huddles of papers, he produced a small bundle of banknotes; from another drawer another bundle. These, however, did not seem to satisfy him entirely. At last, after a good deal of very deliberate search, he unearthed more paper currency from the pocket of a dirty pair of overalls hanging on a nail, and emptied a heap of silver and coppers from a battered can on the shelf. Captain Hunniwell, muttering to himself, watched the collecting process. When it was completed, he asked: "Is this all?" "Eh? Yes, I guess 'tis. I can't seem to find any more just now. Maybe another batch'll turn up later. If it does I'll keep it till next time." The captain, suppressing his emotions, hastily counted the money. "Have you any idea how much there is here?" he asked. "No, I don't know's I have. There's been quite consider'ble comin' in last fortni't or so. Summer folks been payin' bills and one thing or 'nother. Might be forty or fifty dollars, I presume likely." "Forty or fifty! Nearer a hundred and fifty! And you keep it stuffed around in every junk hole from the roof to the cellar. Wonder to me you don't light your pipe with it. I shouldn't wonder if you did. How many times have I told you to deposit your money every three days anyhow? How many times?" Mr. Winslow seemed to reflect. "Don't know, Sam," he admitted. "Good many, I will give in. But-- but, you see, Sam, if--if I take it to the bank I'm liable to forget I've got it. Long's it's round here somewheres I--why, I know where 'tis and--and it's handy. See, don't you?" The captain shook his head. "Jed Winslow," he declared, "as I said to you just now you beat all my goin' to sea. I can't make you out. When I see how you act with money and business, and how you let folks take advantage of you, then I think you're a plain dum fool. And yet when you bob up and do somethin' like gettin' Leander Babbitt to volunteer and gettin' me out of that row with his father, then--well, then, I'm ready to swear you're as wise as King Solomon ever was. You're a puzzle to me, Jed. What are you, anyway--the dum fool or King Solomon?" Jed looked meditatively over his spectacles. The slow smile twitched the corners of his lips. "Well, Sam," he drawled, "if you put it to vote at town meetin' I cal'late the majority'd be all one way. But, I don't know"--; he paused, and then added, "I don't know, Sam, but it's just as well as 'tis. A King Solomon down here in Orham would be an awful lonesome cuss." _ |