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The Road to Damascus: A Trilogy, a play by August Strindberg |
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Part 2 - Act 4 - Scene 1. Banqueting Hall |
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_ PART II ACT IV SCENE I. BANQUETING HALL [The room in which the banquet took place in Act III. It is dirty, and furnished with unpainted wooden tables. Beggars, scavengers and loose women. Cripples are seated here and there drinking by the light of tallow dips.] [The STRANGER and the SECOND WOMAN are sitting together drinking brandy, which stands on the table in front of them in a carafe. The STRANGER is drinking heavily.] WOMAN. Don't drink so much! STRANGER. You see. You've scruples, too! WOMAN. No. But I don't like to see a man I respect lowering himself so. STRANGER. But I came here specially to do so; to take a mud-bath that would harden my skin against the pricks of life. To find immoral support about me. And I chose your company, because you're the most despicable, though you've still retained a spark of humanity. You were sorry for me, when no one else was. Not even myself! Why? WOMAN. Really, I don't know. STRANGER. But you must know that there are moments when you look almost beautiful. WOMAN. Oh, listen to him! STRANGER. Yes. And then you resemble a woman who was dear to me. WOMAN. Thank you! WAITRESS. Don't talk so loud, there's a sick man here. STRANGER. Tell me, have you ever been in love? WOMAN. We don't use that word, but I know what you mean. Yes. I had a lover once and we had a child. STRANGER. That was foolish! WOMAN. I thought so, too, but he said the days liberation were at hand, when all chains would be struck off, all barriers thrown down, and... STRANGER (tortured). And then...? WOMAN. Then he left me. STRANGER. He was a scoundrel. (He drinks.) WOMAN (looking at him.) You think so? STRANGER. Yes. He must have been. WOMAN. Now you're so intolerant. STRANGER (drinking). Am I? WOMAN. Don't drink so much; I want to see you far above me, otherwise you can't raise me up. STRANGER. What illusions you must have! Childish! I lift you up! I who am down below. Yet I'm not; it's not I who sit here, for I'm dead. I know that my soul's far away, far, far away.... (He stares in front of him with an absent-minded air)... where a great lake lies in the sunshine like molten gold; where roses blossom on the wall amongst the vines; where a white cot stands under the acacias. But the child's asleep and the mother's sitting beside the cot doing crochet work. There's a long, long strip coming from her mouth and on the strip is written... wait... 'Blessed are the sorrowful, for they shall be comforted.' But that's not so, really. I shall never be comforted. Tell me, isn't there thunder in the air, it's so close, so hot? WOMAN (looking out of the window). No. I can see no clouds out there.... STRANGER. Strange... that's lightning. WOMAN. No. You're wrong. STRANGER. One, two, three, four, five... now the thunder must come! But it doesn't. I've never been frightened of a thunderstorm until to-day--I mean, until to-night. But is it day or night? WOMAN. My dear, it's night. STRANGER. Yes. It _is_ night. (The DOCTOR has come in during this scene and has sat down behind the STRANGER, without having been seen by him.) WAITRESS. Don't speak so loud, there's a sick person in here. STRANGER (to the WOMAN). Give me your hand. WOMAN (wiping it on her apron). Oh, why? STRANGER. You've a lovely white hand. But... look at mine. It's black. Can't you see it's black? WOMAN. Yes. So it is! STRANGER. Blackened already, perhaps even rotten? I must see if my heart's stopped. (He puts his hand to his heart.) Yes. It has! So I'm dead, and I know when I died. Strange, to be dead, and yet to be going about. But where am I? Are all these people dead, too? They look as if they'd risen from the sewers of the town, or as if they'd come from prison, poorhouse or lock hospital. They're workers of the night, suffering, groaning, cursing, quarrelling, torturing one another, dishonouring one another, envying one another, as if they possessed anything worthy of envy! The fire of sleep courses through their veins, their tongues cleave to their palates, grown dry through cursing; and then they put out the blaze with water, with fire-water, that engenders fresh thirst. With fire-water, that itself burns with a blue flame and consumes the soul like a prairie fire, that leaves nothing behind it but red sand. (He drinks.) Set fire to it. Put it out again. Set fire to it. Put it out again! But what you can't burn up--unluckily--is the memory of what's past. How can that memory be burned to ashes? WAITRESS. Please don't speak so loud, there's a sick man in here. So ill, that he's already asked to be given the sacrament. STRANGER. May he soon go to hell! (Those present murmur at this, resenting it.) WAITRESS. Take care! Take care! WOMAN (to the STRANGER). Do you know that man who's been sitting behind you, staring at you all the time? STRANGER (turning. He and the DOCTOR stare at one another for a moment, without speaking). Yes. I used to know him once. WOMAN. He looks as if he'd like to bite you in the back. (The DOCTOR sits down opposite the STRANGER and stares at him.) STRANGER. What are you looking at? DOCTOR. Your grey hairs. STRANGER (to the WOMAN). Is my hair grey? WOMAN. Yes. Indeed it is! DOCTOR. And now I'm looking at your fair companion. Sometimes you have good taste. Sometimes not. STRANGER. And sometimes you have the misfortune to have the same taste as I. DOCTOR. That wasn't a kind remark! But you've killed me twice in your lifetime; so go on. STRANGER (to the WOMAN). Let's get away from here. DOCTOR. You know when I'm near you. You feel my presence from afar. And I shall reach you, as the thunder will, whether you hide in the depths of the earth or of the sea.... Try to escape me, if you can! STRANGER (to the WOMAN). Come with me. Lead me... I can't see.... WOMAN. No, I don't want to go yet. I don't want to be bored. DOCTOR. You're right there, daughter of joy! Life's hard enough without taking on yourself the sorrows others have brought on themselves. That man won't bear his own sorrows, but makes his wife shoulder the burden for him. STRANGER. What's that? Wait! She bore false witness of a breach of the peace and attempted murder! DOCTOR. Now he's putting the blame on her! STRANGER (resting his head in his hands and letting it sink on to the table. In the far distance a violin and guitar are heard playing the following melody): DOCTOR (to the WOMAN). Is he ill? WOMAN. He must be mad; he says he's dead. (In the distance drums beat the reveille and bugles are blown, but very softly.) STRANGER. Is it morning? Night's passing, the sun's rising and ghosts lie down to sleep again in graves. Now I can go. Come! WOMAN (going nearer to the DOCTOR). No. I said no. STRANGER. Even you, the last of all my friends! Am I such a wretched being, that not even a prostitute will bear me company for money? DOCTOR. You must be. STRANGER. I don't believe it yet; although everyone tells me so. I don't believe anything at all, for every time I have, I've been deceived. But tell me this hasn't the sun yet risen? A little while ago I heard a cock crow and a dog bark; and now they're ringing the Angelus.... Have they put out the lights, that it's so dark? DOCTOR (to the WOMAN). He must be blind. WOMAN. Yes. I think he is. STRANGER. No. I can see you; but I can't see the lights. DOCTOR. For you it's growing dark.... You've played with the lightning, and looked too long at the sun. That is forbidden to men. STRANGER. We're born with the desire to do it; but may not. That's Envy.... DOCTOR. What do you possess that's worthy of envy? STRANGER. Something you'll never understand, and that only I can value. DOCTOR. You mean, the child? MANGER. You know I didn't mean it. If I had I'd have said that I possessed something you could never let. DOCTOR. So you're back at that! Then I'll express myself as clearly: you took what I'd done with. WOMAN. Oh! I shan't stay in the company of such swine! (She gets up and moves to another seat.) STRANGER. I know we've sunk very low; yet I believe the deeper I sink the nearer I'll come to my goal: the end! WAITRESS. Don't speak so loud, there's a dying man in there! STRANGER. Yes, I believe you. The whole time there's been a smell of corpses here. DOCTOR. Perhaps that's us? STRANGER. Can one be dead, without suspecting it? DOCTOR. The dead maintain that they don't know the difference. STRANGER. You terrify me. Is it possible? And all these shadowy figures, whose faces I think I recognise as memories of my youth at school in the swimming bath, the gymnasium.... (He clutches his heart.) Oh! Now he's coming: the Terrible One, who tears the heart out of the breast. The Terrible One, who's been following me for years. He's here! (He is beside himself. The doors are thrown open; a choir boy comes in carrying a lantern made of blue glass that throws a blue light on the guests; he rings the silver bell. All present begin to howl like wild beasts. The DOMINICAN then enters with the sacrament. The WAITRESS and the WOMAN throw themselves on their knees, the others howl. The DOMINICAN raises the monstrance; all fall on their knees. The choir boy and the DOMINICAN go into the room on the left.) BEGGAR (entering and going towards the STRANGER). Come away from here. You're ill. And the bailiffs have a summons for you. STRANGER. Summons? From whom? BEGGAR. Your wife. DOCTOR. The electric eel strikes at a great distance. She once wanted to bring a charge of slander against me, because she couldn't stay out at night. STRANGER. Couldn't stay out at night? DOCTOR. Yes. Didn't you know who you were married to? STRANGER. I heard she'd been engaged before she... married you. DOCTOR. Yes. That's what it was called, but in reality she'd been the mistress of a married man, whom she denounced for rape, after she'd forced herself into his studio and posed to him naked, as a model. STRANGER. And that was the woman you married? DOCTOR. Yes. After she'd seduced me, she denounced me for breach of promise, so I had to marry her. She'd engaged two detectives to see I didn't get away. And that was the woman you married! STRANGER. I did it because I soon saw it was no good choosing when all were alike. BEGGAR. Come away from here. You'll be sorry if you don't. STRANGER (to the DOCTOR). Was she always religious? DOCTOR. Always. STRANGER. And tender, good-hearted, self-sacrificing? DOCTOR. Certainly! STRANGER. Can one understand her? DOCTOR. No. But you can go mad thinking about her. That's why one had to accept her as she was. Charming, intoxicating! STRANGER. Yes, I know. But one's powerless against pity. That's why I don't want to fight this case. I can't defend myself without attacking her; and I don't want to do that. DOCTOR. You were married before. How was that? STRANGER. Just the same. DOCTOR. This love acts like henbane: you see suns, where there are none, and stars where no stars are! But it's pleasant, while it lasts! STRANGER. And the morning after? Oh, the morning after! BEGGAR. Come, unhappy man! He's poisoning you, and you don't know it. Come! STRANGER (getting up). Poisoning me, you say? Do you think he's lying? BEGGAR. Every word he's said's a lie. STRANGER. I don't believe it. BEGGAR. No. You only believe lies. But that serves you right. STRANGER. Has he been lying? Has he? BEGGAR. How can you believe your enemies? STRANGER. But he's my friend, because he's told me the bitter truth. BEGGAR. Eternal Powers, save his reason! For he believes everything evil's true, and everything good evil. Come, or you'll be lost! DOCTOR. He's lost already! And now he'll be whipped into froth, broken up into atoms, and used as an ingredient in the great pan-cake. Away with you hell! (To those present.) Howl like victims of the pit. (The guests all howl.) And no more womanly pity. Howl, woman! (The WOMAN refuses with a gesture of her hand.) STRANGER (to the BEGGAR). That man's not lying. [Curtain.] _ |