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There & Back, a novel by George MacDonald |
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Chapter 9. A Holiday |
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_ CHAPTER IX. A HOLIDAY Richard was willing enough, and it only remained to settle what they would do with their holiday. Suppressing a chuckle, Simon proposed that they should have a walk, and a look at Mortgrange: it was a place well worth seeing! "And then," he added, giving his grandson a poke, "we can ask after the mare, and learn how her new shoe fits." They had known him there, he said, the last thirty years, and would let them have the run of the place, for sir Wilton and his lady were from home. Richard had never--to his knowledge--heard of Mortgrange, for Simon had hitherto avoided even mentioning the place; but he was ready to go wherever his grandfather pleased. Jessie would have company of her own, Simon said, with a nod and a wink: they need not trouble themselves about her! So the next day, as soon us they had had their breakfast, they set out to walk the four or five miles that, by the road, lay between them and Mortgrange. It was a fine frosty morning. Not a few yellow leaves were still hanging, and the sun was warm and bright. It was one of those days near the death of the year, that make us wonder why the heart of man should revive and feel strong, while nature is falling into her dreary trance. Richard was dressed in a tradesman's Sunday clothes, but tradesman as he was, and was proud to be, he did not altogether look one. He was in high spirits--for no reason but that his spirits were high. He was happy because he was happy--"like any other body!" he would have said: where was the wonder such a fine day, with a pleasant walk before him, and his jolly grandfather for company! That he could not make one hair white or black, one hour blessed or miserable, did not occur to him. Yet he believed that joy or sorrow determined whether life was or was not worth living! He had never said to himself, "Here I am, and cannot help being, and yet can order nothing! Even to-day I am happy only because I cannot help it!" He had indeed begun to learn that a man has his duty to mind before his happiness, and that was much; but he had not yet been tried in the matter of doing his duty when unhappy. How would he feel then? Would he think duty without happiness worth living for? He was happy now, and that was enough! The putting forth of their strength and skill doubtless makes many men feel happy--so long as they are in health; but how when they come to feel that that health is nowise in their power? While they have it, it seems a part of their being inalienable; when they have lost it, a thing irrecoverable. Richard took the thing that came, asked no questions, returned no thanks. He found himself here:--whence he came he did not care; whither he went he did not inquire. The present was enough, for the present was good; when the present was no longer good, why, then,--! There are those to whom the present cannot be good save as a mode of the infinite. In such their divine origin asserts itself. Once known for what it is, the poorest present is a phial holding the elixir of life. On their way Simon talked about the place they were going to see, and said its present owner was an elderly man, not very robust, with a second wife, who looked as if she had not a drop of warm blood, and yet as if she might live for ever. "That was their son that came with the little lady," he said. "And the little lady was their daughter, I suppose!" rejoined Richard, with an odd quiver somewhere near his heart. "She's an Australian, they say," answered his grandfather; "--no relation, I fancy." "Is Mortgrange a grand place?" asked Richard. "It's a fine house and a great estate," answered Simon. "More might be made of it, no doubt; and I hope one day more will be made of it." "What do you mean by that, grandfather?" "That I hope the son will make a better landlord than the father." They came to a great iron gate, standing open, without any lodge. "We're in luck!" said the blacksmith. "This will save us a long round! Somebody must have rode out, and been too lazy to shut it! We'd better leave it as we find it, though! Or say we bring the two halves together without snapping the locks! I know the locks; I put 'em both on myself.--See now what a piece of work that gate is! All done with the hand! None o' your beastly casting there! Up to _your_ work, that, I'm thinking, lad!" "Indeed it is! Those gates are worth reducing, for plates to stamp the covers of a right precious volume with!" Simon misunderstood, and was on the point of flaring up, but what Richard followed with quieted him. "I could almost give up bookbinding to work a pair of gates like those!" he said. "I believe you, my boy!" returned his grandfather. "Come and live with me, and you shall!" "But who would buy them when I had worked them?" "If nobody had the sense, we'd put 'em up before the cottage!" "Like a door-lock on a prayer-book!" "No matter! They would be worth the worth of themselves!" "You would have to make the wall so high, there would be no light in the house!" persisted Richard. "Tut, man! did you never hear of a joke? All I say is, that if you'll come and work with me--I don't need to slave more than I like; I've got a few pounds in the bank!--if you'll work, I'll teach you. Leave me to find a fit place for what comes of it! They do most things at the foundries now, but there's a market yet for hammer-work--if it be good enough, and not too dear; for them as knows a good thing when they sees it, ain't generally got much money to buy things. It's my opinion the only way to learn the worth of a thing, is to have to go without it." "Few people fancy iron gates, I fear." "More might fancy them if they were to be had good," returned the old man. The gate had admitted them to a long winding road, with clumps of trees here and there on the borders of it. The road was apparently not much used, for it was more than sprinkled with grass all over. A ploughed field was on one side, and a wild heathy expanse, dotted with fir-trees, on the other. Suddenly on the side of the field, gradually on that of the heath, the ground changed to the green sward of a park. "A grand place for thinking!" said Richard to himself. But in truth Richard had hardly yet begun to think. He only followed the things that came to him; he never said to things, _Come;_ neither, when they came, did he keep them, and make them walk up and down before him till he saw what they were; he did not search out their pedigree, get them to give an account of themselves, show what they could do, or, in short, be themselves to him. He had written a few verses--not bad verses, but with feeling only, not thought in them. For instance, he had addressed an ode to the allegorical personage called Liberty, in which he bepraised her until, had she been indeed a woman, she must have been ashamed: she was the one essential of life! the one glory of existence! he was no man who would not die for her! But what was the thing he thus glorified? Liberty to go where you pleased, do what you liked, say what you chose!--that was all. Of inward liberty, of freedom from mental or spiritual oppression, from passion, from prejudice, from envy, from jealousy, from selfishness, from unfairness, from ambition, from false admiration, from the power of public opinion, from any motive energy save that of love and truth--a freedom of which outward freedom is scarce the shadow--of such liberty, for all the good books he had read, for all the good poems he had admired, Richard had not yet begun to dream, not to say _think_. Then again, he would write about love, and he had never been in love in his life! All he knew of love was the pleasure of imagining himself the object of a tall, dark-eyed, long-haired, devoted woman's admiration. He had never even thought whether he was worthy of being loved. He was indeed more worthy of love than many to whom it is freely given; but he knew no more about it, I say, than a chicken in the shell knows of the blue sky. The shabby spinster, living with her cousin the baker in the house opposite, knew a hundred times better than he what the word _love_ meant: she had a history, he had none. I will not describe the house of Mortgrange. It seemed to Richard the oldest house he had ever seen, and it moved him strangely. He said to himself the man must be happy who called such a house his own, lived in it, and did what he liked with it. The road they had taken brought them to the back of the Hall, as the people on the estate called the house. The blacksmith went to a side-door, and asked if he and his grandson might have a look at the place: he had heard the baronet was from home! The man said he would see; and returning presently, invited them to walk in. Knowing his grandson's passion, Simon's main thought in taking him was to see him in the library, with its ten thousand volumes: it would be such a joke to watch him pondering, admiring, coveting his own! As soon, therefore, as they were in the great hall, he asked the servant whether they might not see the library. The man left them again, once more to make inquiry. It was a grand old hall where they stood, fitter for the house of a great noble than a mere baronet; but then the family was older than any noble family in the county, and the poor baronetcy, granted to a foolish ancestor, on carpet considerations, by the needy hand of the dominie-king, was no great feather in the cap of the Lestranges. The house itself was older than any baronetcy, for no part of it was later than the time of Elizabeth. It was of fine stone, and of great size. The hall was nearly sixty feet in height, with three windows on one side, and a great one at the end. They were thirty feet from the floor, had round heads, and looked like church-windows. The other side was blank. Mid-height along the end opposite the great window ran a gallery. To the sudden terror of Richard, who stood absorbed in the stateliness of the place, an organ in the gallery burst out playing. He looked up trembling, but could see only the tops of the pipes. As the sounds rolled along the roof, reverberated from the solid walls, and crept about the corners, it seemed to him that the soul of the place was throbbing in his ears the words of a poem centuries old, which he had read a day or two before leaving London:--
"Mr. Lestrange is in the library, and will see Mr. Armour," said the voice of the servant. An election was at hand, and at such a time certain persons are more courteous than usual. _ |
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