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Every Man In His Humor, a play by Ben Jonson |
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Act 4 Scene 2 |
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_ ACT IV SCENE II [SCENE II.---The Lane before COB'S House. Enter COB]
Tib. [within.] How now, what cuckold is that knocks so hard? [Enter Tib.] O, husband! is it you? What's the news? Cob. Nay, you have stunn'd me, i'faith; you have, given me a knock O' the forehead will stick by me. Cuckold! 'Slid, cuckold! Tib. Away, you fool! did I know it was you that knocked? Come, come, you may call me as bad when you list. Cob. May I? Tib, you are a whore. Tib. You lie in your throat, husband. Cob. How, the lie! and in my throat tool do you long to be stabb'd, ha? Tib. Why, you are no soldier, I hope. Cob. O, must you be stabbed by a soldier? Mass, that's true! when was Bobadill here, your captain? that rogue. that foist, that fencing Burgullion? I'll tickle him, i'faith. Tib. Why, what's the matter, trow? Cob. O, he has basted me rarely, sumptuously! but I have it here in black and white, [pulls out the warrant.] for his black and blue shall pay him. O, the justice, the honestest old brave Trojan in London; I do honour the very flea of his dog. A plague on him, though, he put me once in a villanous filthy fear; marry, it vanished away like the smoke of tobacco; but I was smoked soundly first. I thank the devil, and his good angel, my guest. Well, wife, or Tib, which you will, get you in, and lock the door; I charge you let nobody in to you, wife; nobody in to you; those are my words: not Captain Bob himself, nor the fiend in his likeness. You are a woman, you have flesh and blood enough in you to be tempted; therefore keep the door shut upon all comers. Tib. I warrant you, there shall nobody enter here without my consent. Cob. Nor with your consent, sweet Tib; and so I leave you. Tib. It's more than you know, whether you leave me so. Cob. How? Tib. Why, sweet.
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