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The Way of All Flesh, by Samuel Butler

CHAPTER VII

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_ A few words may suffice for the greater number of the young people
to whom I have been alluding in the foregoing chapter. Eliza and
Maria, the two elder girls, were neither exactly pretty nor exactly
plain, and were in all respects model young ladies, but Alethea was
exceedingly pretty and of a lively, affectionate disposition, which
was in sharp contrast with those of her brothers and sisters. There
was a trace of her grandfather, not only in her face, but in her
love of fun, of which her father had none, though not without a
certain boisterous and rather coarse quasi-humour which passed for
wit with many.

John grew up to be a good-looking, gentlemanly fellow, with features
a trifle too regular and finely chiselled. He dressed himself so
nicely, had such good address, and stuck so steadily to his books
that he became a favourite with his masters; he had, however, an
instinct for diplomacy, and was less popular with the boys. His
father, in spite of the lectures he would at times read him, was in
a way proud of him as he grew older; he saw in him, moreover, one
who would probably develop into a good man of business, and in whose
hands the prospects of his house would not be likely to decline.
John knew how to humour his father, and was at a comparatively early
age admitted to as much of his confidence as it was in his nature to
bestow on anyone.

His brother Theobald was no match for him, knew it, and accepted his
fate. He was not so good-looking as his brother, nor was his
address so good; as a child he had been violently passionate; now,
however, he was reserved and shy, and, I should say, indolent in
mind and body. He was less tidy than John, less well able to assert
himself, and less skilful in humouring the caprices of his father.
I do not think he could have loved anyone heartily, but there was no
one in his family circle who did not repress, rather than invite his
affection, with the exception of his sister Alethea, and she was too
quick and lively for his somewhat morose temper. He was always the
scapegoat, and I have sometimes thought he had two fathers to
contend against--his father and his brother John; a third and fourth
also might almost be added in his sisters Eliza and Maria. Perhaps
if he had felt his bondage very acutely he would not have put up
with it, but he was constitutionally timid, and the strong hand of
his father knitted him into the closest outward harmony with his
brother and sisters.

The boys were of use to their father in one respect. I mean that he
played them off against each other. He kept them but poorly
supplied with pocket money, and to Theobald would urge that the
claims of his elder brother were naturally paramount, while he
insisted to John upon the fact that he had a numerous family, and
would affirm solemnly that his expenses were so heavy that at his
death there would be very little to divide. He did not care whether
they compared notes or no, provided they did not do so in his
presence. Theobald did not complain even behind his father's back.
I knew him as intimately as anyone was likely to know him as a
child, at school, and again at Cambridge, but he very rarely
mentioned his father's name even while his father was alive, and
never once in my hearing afterwards. At school he was not actively
disliked as his brother was, but he was too dull and deficient in
animal spirits to be popular.

Before he was well out of his frocks it was settled that he was to
be a clergyman. It was seemly that Mr Pontifex, the well-known
publisher of religious books, should devote at least one of his sons
to the Church; this might tend to bring business, or at any rate to
keep it in the firm; besides, Mr Pontifex had more or less interest
with bishops and Church dignitaries and might hope that some
preferment would be offered to his son through his influence. The
boy's future destiny was kept well before his eyes from his earliest
childhood and was treated as a matter which he had already virtually
settled by his acquiescence. Nevertheless a certain show of freedom
was allowed him. Mr Pontifex would say it was only right to give a
boy his option, and was much too equitable to grudge his son
whatever benefit he could derive from this. He had the greatest
horror, he would exclaim, of driving any young man into a profession
which he did not like. Far be it from him to put pressure upon a
son of his as regards any profession and much less when so sacred a
calling as the ministry was concerned. He would talk in this way
when there were visitors in the house and when his son was in the
room. He spoke so wisely and so well that his listening guests
considered him a paragon of right-mindedness. He spoke, too, with
such emphasis and his rosy gills and bald head looked so benevolent
that it was difficult not to be carried away by his discourse. I
believe two or three heads of families in the neighbourhood gave
their sons absolute liberty of choice in the matter of their
professions--and am not sure that they had not afterwards
considerable cause to regret having done so. The visitors, seeing
Theobald look shy and wholly unmoved by the exhibition of so much
consideration for his wishes, would remark to themselves that the
boy seemed hardly likely to be equal to his father and would set him
down as an unenthusiastic youth, who ought to have more life in him
and be more sensible of his advantages than he appeared to be.

No one believed in the righteousness of the whole transaction more
firmly than the boy himself; a sense of being ill at ease kept him
silent, but it was too profound and too much without break for him
to become fully alive to it, and come to an understanding with
himself. He feared the dark scowl which would come over his
father's face upon the slightest opposition. His father's violent
threats, or coarse sneers, would not have been taken au serieux by a
stronger boy, but Theobald was not a strong boy, and rightly or
wrongly, gave his father credit for being quite ready to carry his
threats into execution. Opposition had never got him anything he
wanted yet, nor indeed had yielding, for the matter of that, unless
he happened to want exactly what his father wanted for him. If he
had ever entertained thoughts of resistance, he had none now, and
the power to oppose was so completely lost for want of exercise that
hardly did the wish remain; there was nothing left save dull
acquiescence as of an ass crouched between two burdens. He may have
had an ill-defined sense of ideals that were not his actuals; he
might occasionally dream of himself as a soldier or a sailor far
away in foreign lands, or even as a farmer's boy upon the wolds, but
there was not enough in him for there to be any chance of his
turning his dreams into realities, and he drifted on with his
stream, which was a slow, and, I am afraid, a muddy one.

I think the Church Catechism has a good deal to do with the unhappy
relations which commonly even now exist between parents and
children. That work was written too exclusively from the parental
point of view; the person who composed it did not get a few children
to come in and help him; he was clearly not young himself, nor
should I say it was the work of one who liked children--in spite of
the words "my good child" which, if I remember rightly, are once put
into the mouth of the catechist and, after all, carry a harsh sound
with them. The general impression it leaves upon the mind of the
young is that their wickedness at birth was but very imperfectly
wiped out at baptism, and that the mere fact of being young at all
has something with it that savours more or less distinctly of the
nature of sin.

If a new edition of the work is ever required I should like to
introduce a few words insisting on the duty of seeking all
reasonable pleasure and avoiding all pain that can be honourably
avoided. I should like to see children taught that they should not
say they like things which they do not like, merely because certain
other people say they like them, and how foolish it is to say they
believe this or that when they understand nothing about it. If it
be urged that these additions would make the Catechism too long I
would curtail the remarks upon our duty towards our neighbour and
upon the sacraments. In the place of the paragraph beginning "I
desire my Lord God our Heavenly Father" I would--but perhaps I had
better return to Theobald, and leave the recasting of the Catechism
to abler hands. _

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